2003 Year-End Round-Up
I saw over 200 theatrical releases this year -- more than in any other year, I believe, and maybe too many. The Oscar race has fleshed out nicely; there is only one potential nominee that I strongly dislike (The Last Samurai), and it was snubbed almost entirely at the Golden Globes, so things are looking up. I have two flat-out masterpieces heading up my top ten list, and an incomparable travesty at the pinnacle of the bottom five. Spielberg took a year off; so did Scorsese and Shyamalan. Anthony Minghella and Tim Burton came back with two remarkably odd projects. Conan the Barbarian became governor. The Lord of the Rings trilogy closed out with a vengeance. It's been eventful.
This time, I've tried to expand my coverage a bit, adding exceedingly brief comments to each of the entries in each of the supplemental categories. As of this writing, I still have not seen three potential entrants into the year's pantheon -- Robert Altman's The Company, Errol Morris's Fog of War and Monster, which apparently features something incredible from Charlize Theron -- so it's possible that one or two or three of those will make a belated appearance sometime in January. Everything other than the top ten and bottom five is in no particular order.
The Barbarian Invasions: Talked about for a while then ignored when push came to shove, French Canadian Denys Arcand's talky indie winds up being the very definition of bittersweet.
House of Sand and Fog: "Some dreams can't be shared" proclaims the poster, and indeed, this is a heartbreaking examination of how the American Dream forces us into conflict. Ben Kingsley is nothing short of astonishing.
Shattered Glass: Hayden Christiansen atones for Episode II with this taut, impossibly suspenseful based-on-a-true-story drama. Peter Sarsgaard is pretty great too.
Spy Kids 3-D: "I'm taking this to the NEXT LEVEL!"
Dirty Pretty Things: Sometimes dead serious, other times oddly farcical, Stephen Frears' venture into the immigrant underworld of London introduces us to the very talented Chiwetel Ejiofor.
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl: A perfect example of what happens when unabashed commercialism and skillful artistry combine. Johnny Depp has no chance at the Oscar he deserves.
Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines: Ever wonder what kind of a director Michael Bay would be if only he were talented? He still would not be as good as Jonathan Mostow.
Down With Love: If the production design is the star of this show, then the charming Renee Zellweger and Ewan McGregor are at least worthy supporting players.
Holes: A true family movie, smart, funny, and just a little cynical. Deservingly launched the career of Shia LaBeaouf.
The Battle of Shaker Heights: I don't even want to hear it, okay?
Identity: I love movies that skillfully and purposefully fake me out (purposefully, i.e. not The Usual Suspects), and this one's a doozie.
A Mighty Wind: Christopher Guest, I love you.
Dreamcatcher: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUGH!" should adequately describe my frustration with the drumming this movie has taken from everyone. They didn't get it. More below.
Willard: More character study than horror flick, this is a terrific mood piece with an appropriately freaky Crispin Glover turn.
Irreversible: You have been warned. By everyone. A thousand times. But I think you should still take the plunge.
Lost in La Mancha: Really, really sad.
The Guru: Really, really upbeat.
Man on the Train: Really, really... uh... French. And good.
Something's Gotta Give: "A" grade cast and "F" grade script combine for a thoroughly "C" grade movie.
The Last Samurai: Get back to the make-up trailer Tom, the wind machine has wiped off your rouge.
Elf: Will Ferrell is very, very funny in very, very small doses.
Pieces of April: Maybe I'm being a grinch on this, I dunno. Everyone else loved it. I thought it was glaringly false and artificial.
Kill Bill: Look at me, I'm Quentin Tarantino! I swindled more than $100 million from Harvey Weinstein! Look how much fake blood I can buy!
The Rundown: I liked the title just fine, actually. It was the movie I had a problem with.
Matchstick Men: One of those movies that absolutely should have worked and then just doesn't.
Open Range: Very, very, involving first half, very, very Costner second half.
Seabiscuit: Didn't want the history lesson. Thanks anyway.
Lilya 4-Ever: Need to see this again. In the meantime, I am sticking to my claim that this is little more than a wallow in miserabilism.
Blue Car Traditional "indie" filmmaking at its worst.
The Singing Detective: Yes, that really is Mel Gibson. And this movie really is pretty good.
In the Cut: Yes, that really is Meg Ryan. And this movie really is pretty good.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: More on this below.
demonlover: I'm not sure I get it, but I'm sure I love this stuff.
Duplex: Danny DeVito is still a funny guy, penchant for killing old ladies and all.
Anything Else: Woody Allen is still a funny guy, repetition and all.
The Battle of Shaker Heights: I said I didn't wanna hear it.
Le Divorce: I don't remember much about this one, but I remember that I liked it. And I'll take Naomi Watts here over her in 21 Grams
How to Deal: Mandy Moore is a fine actress. No, really, she is. And this was the perfect project for her.
Hollywood Homicide: Hello? Anybody home? People, this was a parody of buddy cop movies. NOBODY got this one.
Rugrats Go Wild: Unexpectedly amusing, this third big screen venture for the Nickelodeon franchise gives the adults a lot of screen time and gets a lot of laughs.
The Matrix Reloaded: More on this below.
Dreamcatcher: BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! The wild shifts in tone are intentional. The silliness works. This movie kicks ass.
Basic: Everyone's right, actually. This is a parlor trick of a movie. It's just a really neat parlor trick.
Deliver Us From Eva: What? You've forgotten this movie? You don't say.
5. Tears of the Sun: Boring, condescending and lame as all hell, this Bruce Willis war flick tries to show us how noble and good the United States army really is, but only shows how painful an actor Willis can be when saddled with something as awful as this.
4. Sylvia: Suicidal poets are no fun to begin with, but whiny, self-important ones are just hell to spend time with. Ask anyone who shelled out money for this arthouse disaster, which introduces the least likable protagonist of the year and then expects us to wish she didn't kill herself. Right.
3. My Boss's Daughter: Obscenely unpleasant and unpleasantly obscene, this is an inexplicably unwatchable effort from David "Airplane!" Zucker. The one word to describe this is probably "uncomfortable," as we are forced to endure misunderstanding after unfortunate coincidence after embarassment. Thankfully, audiences stayed away in droves.
2. Kangaroo Jack: Almost too easy, and the only thing to really be said is this: not even Christopher Walken could wake me from my stupor.
1. Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd: A masterpiece in some alternate universe, this movie sets the record for fewest laughs in a feature-length comedy. My astonishment that this script actually made it through development is equalled only by my admiration for everyone involved with the tolerable original who stayed away from this travesty.
10. The Matrix Reloaded: I considered kicking this off the list after the conclusion to the trilogy shit all over this brilliant second sequel, but that wouldn't be fair: just because its ideas were summarily dumped doesn't mean it wasn't chock full of them to begin with. The first two films in this franchise were the best thing since sliced bread; the trilogy is a tragedy.
9. Ping Pong: No one has heard of or seen this one, which made its festival rounds and got a region 2 DVD release, but that's about it. It's one of the best sports movies I've ever seen, entirely focused, bizarrely suspenseful, well-acted and clever. Probably a better work of pop philosophy than The Matrix.
8. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: Yes, yes, I know. Ebert despised it and everyone else thought it was a pointless, mediocre remake. I thought it was one of the few real horror movies ever made, intending to make you genuinely frightened and uncomfortable rather than to provoke laughs. Forget the wimpy, wishy-washy Cabin Fever. This movie isn't playing around.
7. Secret Lives of Dentists: Seen by few but acclaimed by those who saw it, Alan Rudolph's plotless, intimate dramedy about marriage and family is strange and hyper-realistic at the same time, featuring a typical tour-de-force perfomance from Campbell Scott. The rare adult movie not made with Oscar in mind.
6. Bad Santa: Hilariously, uncompromisingly nasty, Terry Zwigoff's follow-up to Ghost World makes your jaw drop in shock but never abandons its characters. You wouldn't think this kind of movie would be headed for a happy ending, but then Zwigoff and his screenwriters unleash the best, most cynical happy ending of all time. I was so grateful that Miramax had the guts to release this movie around the holidays.
5. Lost in Translation: Everything's been said at this point, I think, though I seem to be one of the few people that doesn't see this as a May-December romance, or indeed much of a romance at all. To me, Bob and Charlotte don't fall in love, they fall beyond love; "soulmates" is the appropriate term, I guess, though even that seems painfully inadequate. Anyway, the movie's great.
4. Sweet Sixteen: The film's original tagline, "It's you and Liam against the world," was absolutely perfect: Martin Compston's Liam is the year's most innately sympathetic character, and his nobility and determination in the face of impossible circumstances is heart-shattering. Movie's thesis is simple, and Ken Loach is still every bit the social activist, but this little movie packed a lot of dramatic force.
3. To Be and to Have: I never quite got around to reviewing this little French documentary, but I think the world of it anyway: quiet, unique, and at least giving the illusion of impeccable naturalism, it's the third little-seen gem on this list. Seems shapeless for a while, but then you realize that in fact it's heading somewhere, and the emotional payoff we eventually get is one of the year's most satisfying.
2. Big Fish: Seems too much like Oscar bait to be a Tim Burton movie, doesn't it, what with the feverish emotional pitch and the easily palatable story about a son trying to reconcile with and learn about his dying father. But it's every bit the Burton film -- his magnum opus, actually -- strange, wonderful, uplifting and poignant at the same time.
1. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King: And thus it ends, the greatest film trilogy of all time and the awesome cinematic achievement of our time. It ends on a helluva note, too; The Return of the King is the longest, richest, deepest film of the three, its story played out on an unprecedented physical and emotional scale. I don't know when I will have another moviegoing experience like this, but I almost wouldn't mind if it weren't too soon. There's only so much I can take.
©2003 Eugene Novikov